Some days I actually wonder how someone thought it was a good idea to put me in charge of a little person. It took me long enough to accept there was a crazy man who likes me enough to spend every day with me until one of us dies. It’s very difficult functioning, washing and dressing myself let alone look after the health and wellbeing of a tiny, defenceless little monster/child. I wonder how I ever grew up enough to be an adult. My favourite quote from Grey’s Anatomy is ‘when did we grow up? And how do we make it stop?’ It doesn’t help that Facebook keeps telling me I have memories from 8 years ago that I seem to think were really last week.
Honestly, I can’t be the only one who looks in the mirror and thinks ‘what am I actually doing here? Someone mixed me up because I don’t have a clue’. I’m actually quite impressed when by the end of the day no mass peril has befallen any of us, everyone is clean, fed and watered and the house is still standing.
Actually, it’s more than that. The house could be described as clean (ish), the mini me is often found laughing, cheering and hugging us so I guess she’s happy (I’ll skip over the screaming and the tantrums for now) and I seem to have compliments about her wherever I go, which makes me feel good. It certifies and quantifies me as a parent – I’m currently succeeding at producing a relatively ok human being.
I may not be making rainbow spaghetti every day but between the husband and I my pride is swelling, not at the achievements of our daughter but at us as parents, educating and encouraging and creating this new little person. We’re not perfect, of course not but so often we berate ourselves as parents that we don’t stop and look at what we do achieve.
I’m proud of me as a mum. I grew this baby inside and now I’m growing her outside. Every word she learns or step she takes isn’t me, that’s her doing but as her parents we’re encouraging and helping with that. Having a baby is tiring, hard, exhausting, exhilarating, rewarding and so, so fulfilling. There’s nothing to prepare you for it, no course to go on, no right or wrong way. There’s no other job that would expect you to do that.
Mums and dads, our children might be awesome but we’re even better.